The schools have now broken up for the summer holiday (recess, vacation etc. depending on your country of origin). For this particular holiday, I will be partially responsible for occupying and entertaining a small child (species: Homo sapiens) and my aims are simple:
- To prevent it from becoming bored
- To prevent myself from becoming bored
- To stimulate its mind and encourage it to grow and learn
- To stay sane
To this end, I have devised a cunning plan. Using my extensive project management skills, I have broken down the time available into manageable chunks, assigning activities along the way.
- The child is on holiday from school for 44 days
- Which equates to 1,056 hours
- Lending the child to distant relatives for one week (168 hours) will leave 37 days (888 hours) to fill
- Sleeping will account for 10 hours a day (370 hours) leaving 518 to fill
- Eating will account for 1 hour a day (37 hours) leaving 481 to fill
- Reading will account for 1 hour a day (37 hours) leaving 444 to fill
- Watching television will account for 1 hour a day (37 hours) leaving 407 to fill
- Taking to playground will account for 1 hour a day (37 hours) leaving 370 to fill
- One organised day-trip per week will account for (say) 6 hours per week leaving 340 to fill
- A couple of cinema trips (hey “Yogi Bear” is on this week) would account for 6 hours leaving 334 to fill
You see, now I’m already down to 32% of the original time with not one moment of boredom for the tiny humanoid.
Conclusion, I rock at child care, what’s all the fuss about?
Now, if only I could fill that last 334 hours.