Whoops, it might be sooner than I thought

In recent years (and certainly since I turned forty) I had assumed that my fiftieth birthday would be the half-way point in my life. In other words, I was still in the first half. I hadn’t reached the point of no return and was a long way from starting the second half.

I had time to sit back and relax before the serious work of “life” began in earnest.
And then a book that I’ve been waiting for arrived today in the mail. It’s the “Pocket Ref” by Thomas J. Glover and has a huge variety of useful (and for others useless) information. It’s a pocket reference guide to the world really. Sample topics include :

  • Hand signals for crane and hoists (p.105)
  • Formulas for electricity (p.203)
  • Clamping force and standard dry torque (p.407)
  • Approximate hole sizes for wood screws (p.442)
  • Beaufort wind strength scale (p.640)
  • Igneous rock classification (p.368)
  • Mortality tables (p.328)

Yep, it was that last one that got me. It helpfully tells you how many more years you’ve got left to live, given your existing age today. It’s based upon the United States Social Security Administration Period Life Table.

And, apparently, a male of my age today, has only another 29.71 years left.

SHIT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was banking on getting to one hundred. I’ve got stuff to do don’t you know. And there’s a myriad of kink that I haven’t tried yet. And I do intend to try them all you know!

Actually I’ve just noticed that a woman gets an extra 4.5 so I might go and get “swapped over” to buy me some time.

Ironically, I notice that the table is immediately followed by a “Firewood / Fuel comparison” chart (p.330). So at least I now know the most efficient way to self-cremate.

Useful book.


About Words of Little Relevance

Freelance stage manager; software and web tester; Excel and map geek; Tweeter; Blogger and Cake Eater. Often back-stage in and around Oxfordshire and Buckinghamshire where I move scenes, or play with lights or sound.
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2 Responses to Whoops, it might be sooner than I thought

  1. >O yes this book is looking equal or just like a Ramayana.

  2. Margo says:

    >God, you're a joy, even when you're being morbid xxxx

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